Why Blogging?

Bismillaah

First thing's first, blogging is definitely a hobby for me before it's a job. In fact, it's almost a need hence my return to the blogging world has me feeling like I have an additional activity in my life that not only belongs to me and serves a purpose solely for me (in terms of my household) but it's something else to make my days even more fulfilling. It feels strange even writing that because it feels like one of my private thoughts that I would usually keep to myself but instead, I'm here, about to post it and expose an aspect of my inner being. Yeah, it's that deep.

Blogging as a Job

Would I ever blog for money? Ummm, maybe. It's crossed my mind multiple times but it's something I still haven't looked into enough. It's really not a priority for me at the moment anyway, right now I'm just here to express my thoughts and get back into writing on a regular basis. 

Blogging History

I was never an avid blogger as such, but being someone who enjoys writing poetry I always had a piece or two to share. I remember creating a Tumblr account when it was sooo dead, but for whatever reason I was really digging the layout. To be honest, I used to make accounts on anything and everything 🙈  for example, I'm a grown woman with a Nintendo account, just...yeah...don't even ask. So after a while I deleted my Tumblr account only to rediscover the platform a couple years later when it had pretty much blown up; it became poetry central for me lool. RIP Tumblr. Twitter and Facebook have both had their dose of Poetrise Stanzafire - yes, this was my pen name, no regrets - but I've been done with social media for a minute now. Actually, I think that's what has put me off jumping back onto Blogger for so long; I guess I'm just very cautious of the sites I intentionally expose myself to on a regular basis as there's a lot of negativity that can be very easily internalised from social media. I feel like I had more to say here but I honestly can't remember what it was. I'm sure it will return to me some day lol, when that happens I guess it will be time for another post In shaa Allaah.

Singlehood -> Motherhood -> Whoamihood?

What really made me decide to start blogging again? I never thought I'd use this term...like, in my life...but, I guess I've been finding myself again. Alhamdulillaah, I've been blessed to have a family of my own and I cannot be anything but grateful for that no matter what trials may come our way. However, I realised I had become too consumed in my day-to-day as a mother that I hadn't continued following my own passions. That, dear reader, does not breed a healthy relationship between a husband and wife or between a mother and her children. 

I have aaaaaaalways wanted a family, there was no doubt about that whatsoever. Even now, one of my biggest goals in life is to be an organised and attentive mother and wife who raises her children to be righteous Muslims. I know that being a homemaker is not necessarily a passion for many women, but I honestly don't care as it's something I consider to be honourable and praiseworthy with a high status. 

Ok...so I've returned to this post about 24hrs after starting it and I've really lost my train of thought...it's just after 6 in the morning and my one year old is passionately attempting to sabotage any thought processing that may be trying to occur. I think I was starting to explain how my love for being a homemaker has not decreased or made me feel unfulfilled but I've realised that you cannot lose yourself in a life role such as being a wife or a mother because it ends up sucking the "life" part out of the role. It ends up being a mundane job because you're not really in it anymore. You've succumbed to the tiresome routine of serving everyone and neglecting yourself - I mean, that's bound to breed negativity, right? Ugh. So the baby just found a hairball and attempted to eat it 😐 wish I could say she's never done that before. Anyway, yeah, so I guess my point is that when you're able to follow your passion or at least not completely let go of who you were before marriage/children (the good stuff, you know 😅) you bring that into your relationships and this new life that you have and it adds to the excitement of your day-to-day.

Well, I'll leave it here although I'm not fully satisfied with the ending of this post. I, admittedly, am being distracted and don't want it to be another 24hrs before I return to this post lol because I do think that's one of the factors that puts me off starting things - the thought that I won't be able to do them perfectly due to distractions (i.e. the kids - no offence to you guys when you're old enough to read and find this blog 😝). But yeah, here I am posting an imperfect post and just about being ok with it 👍

Umm Raadiyah